Community Counselling..

The meetings begun with the women two weeks ago, with conversations on early marriages and issues affecting young girls. Today the meeting became a community counselling process. Women, men and younger women who are married were present.

The younger women were saying that they are forced into marriage, parents think that's the only option, while they are eager to continue with education. It was healthy to have the 'men' as part of the conversation, including the elders of the community. They openly shared their concern, sometimes in anger; but the women somehow; today; had the confident to stand up for themselves and share their thoughts. Young women, shared their concern too, everyone blamed everyone for a few minutes ( which was a healthy stage in the reconciliation and healing)

The older men, said younger men have a hunger for marriage, otherwise they become angry and threaten to run away from home if their parents don't find a girl for them. There is pressure too for the parents, although the cases are few on this concern!

We have been talking about the effects of early marriages, and the community is grasping with those thoughts. One major reason for those concern; is the fact that parents don't keep a record of when their children were born. We shared that in home visits and community conversation, we have asked how old people are; and they say they dong know. The community members, laughed and confirmed! they will say, 'I think my daughter is around 11 or 15, maybe 16 " One of my favorite friends;( Rebbecca), has no clue how old she is; its like speaking a different language to her. This issue, became a conversation that ended on some decisions being made. Documenting some basic information about their children. Sometimes, girls are mistaken to be older and yet are still young because even parents have no idea of their age.

We asked parents if they have ever asked their children of their visions/hopes, dreams e.t.c, they said "NO, we know whats best for them" the younger married girls in the meeting said, it would make a difference if we were asked those questions, we also think of the future and want to have an education, we are thrown into the marriage.

It was a breaking through community counselling segment, still at its early stage. The community members still said there are changes with the new generation, and the community too has been shifting since we begun the talks. There are learning's happening all over with the team.

We meet again next Tuesday for another meeting.